AIMING YOUR CHILDREN
Copyright © Jules Dervaes
August 7, 1982
Was he the meanest dad that ever lived? Was he a dictator who subjected his children to a life of misery? Were the commands that he gave his family cruel, the rules unfair? Absolutely, positively not. I think he was one of the greatest fathers whose names are found in the pages of the Bible. Yet, the Bible tells us practically nothing about him. It does record one episode involving his descendants. And it is from their example we can learn what kind of dad he really was. Their example serves as a powerful witness proving that he was an exceptional dad. And because of their obedience to him and to his commands, his family was given a special blessing–a special promise from God.
Who was this mystery father? I am here today to tell you about a man named JONADAB (or Jehonabad) and to encourage you to aim your children in the right direction. Look at this inspiring example of Jonadab’s offspring called the RECABITES [Jer. 35: 6 & 7]. Two hundred and fifty years had passed and they were still holding fast to some difficult and unpopular rules. [In verses 18 & 19] this family was commended by God, and was held up as an example to the rest of God’s people. The father had indeed left his trademark on his children. Realize this: there is someone–if any of that family is living today–a man, or men, who are now, this very day, serving God. What a beautiful legacy! What more could a father ask for than to have his children and his children’s children serving God. You just can’t have it any better than that!
What brought this special blessing about? Jonadab must have been a very effective father because he guided his family so well. Surely, he did ONE thing especially well. This man pointed the way; he set the standards; he determined the direction. He took his responsibility very seriously as he commanded his children to “GO THIS WAY–LIVE THIS WAY.” Yes, it could seem that he went overboard and beyond the norm and imposed arbitrary rules. But this was because he was extremely dedicated and had realized a deeper purpose to life. This dedication to high principles was so strongly instilled in this man that his way of life was accepted by and transferred to his offspring. Two hundred and fifty years later they were still following his lead.
How did he do that? By providing them with a target and a set of rules to go by. He took aim at a lofty, noble target. Then, he aimed his children toward it.
Why can’t we do the same? Like Jonadab we should aim our children. Psalms 127:4 says that children are arrows. Now what is an arrow for? A decoration, an ornament? No, an arrow is a good arrow if it is either flying toward a target or sticking to it. It is aimless and worthless if it is laying on a shelf or randomly shot up into the air. An arrow must be aimed at a specific target.
Also, it travels only when SOMEONE aims it. The same holds true with a child. He is totally dependent on someone to aim him. He cannot aim himself. No child has that ability. God has seen to that; He has made the child exclusively dependent on the parents for guidance. God not only wants us, but requires us, to aim our children. It is not an option: To point them in the right direction, to guide them, to instruct them, to command them. All children absolutely need this. There is not one child here, or anywhere, that does not need and really desires to be aimed, and they need it so very badly.
There is just no denying that parenting is pointing. This aiming process is the most significant function that you will perform as parents. If you don’t do it, then BEWARE because someone else will. There is TV, school, peer group, or rock group. All are anxious to step in and take your place. They all will try to guide your children, but usually to all the wrong targets. All different directions make a child hopelessly confused.
That is where you come in. You are the one that makes the difference. It is all in your hands. A child needs to know and to feel that he is in the hands of his parent, to know that you are his archer, that you are holding the bow and not some stranger. See those arrows sitting beside you? They belong to you. They have been given to you, and to you alone, for direction. Even though it will require much effort and will bring you many tears, keep your hands on your children, with hands-on training.
If you make your children do the YES lesson, a correspondence course lesson, a Bible study, are you a mean parent? Satan has perverted the truth. You are the most loving parent, if you do point them in the right direction.
In all ways, in every thing, all the time, aim your children. It is never too late. You can do it with God’s help, because with God all things are possible. But you must do your part. You must take each arrow from your quiver and you must place it in the bow. You must sight the target and focus in on that. Recall the example of Jonadab that God has shown you, as members of His church, and remember the result. He was not, by any means, a mean dad. What he really was was a most loving dad by being a skilled and dedicated master archer. For he aimed his children well and he hit the target. And his family received a fantastic promise as a reward.
Then, you will be ready!! READY? AIM carefully and steadily aim skillfully and resolutely, aim that arrow, aim and FIRE it towards the bull’s-eye of the Kingdom of God!